Un tit led

Video

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 21:14:48 -0400

Photo

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 21:14:34 -0400

archaeologysucks: moami: deseng: moami: if you find bones in the forest, sit a bit and listen....

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 19:23:07 -0400

moami:

deseng:

moami:

if you find bones in the forest, sit a bit and listen. they are old and have some good stories to tell. maybe they’ll teach you a spell or two, or explain where the water on our planet came from.

if you find bones by the ocean, run. don’t look back. run, faster, faster. the sea may love you but there are nights where she knows neither mercy nor science, and the bones warn you only once.

boi if you find bones call the police i hate this website so much

this is a piece of creative writing, in case you couldn’t tell from the fact that real bones don’t usually go hey lil’ mama lemme whisper bony secrets in your ear or warn you of the incoming tides like a calcified weather frog.

Also, bones in the forest are probably just a deer or a raccoon or something, so maybe don’t freak out and call the police every time you find a bone.

writteninsomnia: whoopsrobots: you-only-liberate-once: my host mom in Japan referred to her Roomba...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 19:22:34 -0400

writteninsomnia:

whoopsrobots:

you-only-liberate-once:

my host mom in Japan referred to her Roomba as “Roomba-san” and when it would get stuck she would just look over it and softly say “ganbatte, Roomba-san…ganbatte” as it made distressed beeping noises at her

“Ganbatte: Cheer up, Be courageous, Do your best”

This is so pure. OMG

Request: "I have a whole catacomb of bones to pick with you." (credit to @glumshoe for this brilliant turn of phrase 😁)

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 19:03:27 -0400

lmao excellent, i’ll remember to tag ‘em when the post goes live

(i’m answering old asks rn, the box isn’t open yet, im trying to get through a shitload of requests)

Photo

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 02:44:06 -0400

theshitpostcalligrapher: Here’s something I did awhile back...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 00:39:30 -0400

theshitpostcalligrapher:

Here’s something I did awhile back when I got anon hate saying “you are weak and your family is weak”. It’s not the best but it’s pretty damn good considering that it was done in mspaint and I have dysgraphia.
submitted by @soup-medic
bruh i love it this is some classic fuckin shitposting, i love mspaint.
honestly i’d link yall to some of my mspaint art but uh. i only did it for one fandom and yall know which one it was for

pleasestopandrew: emotionalempowerer: “Abusers protect...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 23:18:39 -0400

pleasestopandrew:

emotionalempowerer:

“Abusers protect abusers” … louder for the people in the back!

Protect Terry Crews

fckmeintheassihatethisname: a-tergo-lupi: Just gonna leave this...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 23:14:40 -0400

fckmeintheassihatethisname:

a-tergo-lupi:

Just gonna leave this here 😊

Photo

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 23:11:37 -0400

pizzaotter: spookyknightoftime: pure-posts: MY FUCKIN HEART I WISH YALL WOULD STOP POSTING...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 23:09:40 -0400

pizzaotter:

spookyknightoftime:

pure-posts:

MY FUCKIN HEART

I WISH YALL WOULD STOP POSTING THIS SAD POKÉMON SHIT I CANT TAKE ANYMORE

spitblaze: viewtifulpup: spitblaze: viewtifulpup: Does /v/ actually like video games? I am not...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 23:06:52 -0400

spitblaze:

viewtifulpup:

spitblaze:

viewtifulpup:

Does /v/ actually like video games?

I am not convinced they do.

You can’t fool me, I know /v/ considers people that like Demon Souls to be snobby hipsters and ppl that play SSB Melee to be obnoxious tryhards.

Thanks for the feedback! Heres a revised version

theshitpostcalligrapher: neither of my parents think bone has a smell but there’s a comb in my...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 23:06:42 -0400

theshitpostcalligrapher:

neither of my parents think bone has a smell but there’s a comb in my house that is evidently made of oxhoof and to me it smells like the inside of a goddamn hunting cabin and i keep absentmindedly using it and getting mentally dropped into the hunting void and i dont fucking appreciate that one bit

naamahdarling: iconuk01: brunhiddensmusings: vampire-rooster: the-real-d-sandman: daisenseiben: ...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 21:14:26 -0400

naamahdarling:

iconuk01:

brunhiddensmusings:

vampire-rooster:

the-real-d-sandman:

daisenseiben:

superllama42:

tilthat:

TIL one of Frank Abagnale’s first cons included, disguising as a security guard, hanging a sign above a bank drop box that read, “Out of service, leave deposit with security guard”. Later he commented how he could not believe it worked, “How can a drop box be out of service?”

via reddit.com

Apparently Catch Me If You Can was going to include this con but they had to cancel the scene because when they tried to film it people kept walking up and trying to give Leo their money.

So a professor of mine used to work at a bank back in the day. She says one day a guy in professional attire and a clipboard shows up in a big moving truck. He says he’s from the home office and they’re changing all the chairs. He’s needs them to just load all their old chairs into his truck and later he’d be back with the replacements.

And that’s how they gave away their office furniture to a conman whose master plan was “Wear a tie and carry a clipboard.”

Looking professional is just a pass to do whatever the hell you want.

Put a suit on and you can get almost anywhere.

there’s more to it, look nice and ACT LIKE YOU BELONG. If you don’t look like you belong there, people will stop you.

this smacks of a chef i heard of that was tired to death that every single person ordered their eggs ‘over easy’, so asked the waitress to say ‘were out of over easy, we have plenty of scrambled’ and nobody questioned it

How low must your self image be to plan to rob a bank and all you take is some second hand chairs?

I 100% believe this was a former employee with a grudge.

extragalacticy: Photo by Johannes Plenio on Unsplash

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 21:11:30 -0400

extragalacticy:

Photo by Johannes Plenio on Unsplash

geekmystic: just-shower-thoughts: Since the cell phone has largely replaced the wrist watch as a...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 20:34:13 -0400

geekmystic:

just-shower-thoughts:

Since the cell phone has largely replaced the wrist watch as a time piece, we’ve essentially gone back in time a couple hundred years to when everyone carried pocket watches.

Writing prompt: You go back in time to when pocketwatches were popular. You try to explain that your phone is a communication device. But your new friends are just amazed at how far pocketwatches have come.

“George! This pocketwatch has games on it! I can play this game to tune out your existential droning!”

dynastylnoire: writernotwaiting: hellenhighwater: astolen98sat...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 20:33:24 -0400

dynastylnoire:

writernotwaiting:

hellenhighwater:

astolen98saturnsedan:

luadell:

thisnewdevilry:

sputnikcentury:

teapotsahoy:

lovedsomuch:

warsfeils:

anubituf:

harukami:

last-snowfall:

weareallmedie:

firedanceryote:

reptila-tequila:

qeilla:

thefreckledavantgardegoober:

mysticmisfit89:

Meanwhile, in prehistoric Canada…..

No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck.

And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car.

moose are actual legit ice age megafauna; theyve been here since the ice age, they are old as fuck. they also are pretty terrifying and ive echoed this before but i went to wiki and “In terms of raw numbers, they attack more people than bears and wolves combined” and “ In the Americas, moose injure more people than any other wild mammal and, worldwide, only hippopotamuses injure more.”

like, fuck off with that

I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals.

They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.”

Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people.

Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night.

Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away.

I’ve definitely talked with people who thought moose were deer-sized or maybe horse-sized and I was like NO YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND MOOSE ARE TERRIFYING

Moose are terrifying, you guys.

I finally live on a province where moose and deer exist.

I do not drive at night in fear of meeting one. If you hit a moose going 90 on a highway, not only is your car trashed, you are probably trashed. I’ve seen cars that got wrecked and there seems to be a consensus that at least half the time, the giant fucking beastie just shakes itself off and continues gallumphing along the countryside.

If you fucking hit a moose with your car and their legs go through your windshield, congratulations, you are dead. Massive hooves kicking you to death? Yeah.

Moose are fucking terrifying. Bull moose won’t fuck with you too much unless you fuck with them, but the time a bull moose casually swaggered his way past 7 year old me when I was sledding literally put me off winter sports for a solid month.

Momma moose and their babies, though? I legitimately had to call in to work to be like “ey yo there is a moose in my driveway and I can’t get out” AND MY MANAGERS UNDERSTOOD.

Moose. MOOSE.

I have to admit I thought they were like a Canadian deer before this.

The commenter above who claims that moose’s eyes don’t reflect light is only partially correct; if you shine a flashlight in a moose’s eyes it will glow like a cat (and then you will probably get killed to death by an annoyed moose) but the reason they are so dangerous to cars at nights is that they are too tall for the headlights to reach. Think about that.

Moose confirmed for actual kaiju.

Kaiju category: Maple.

Now I kinda want a kaiju movie set in Canada where it’s just a moose. Like a regular moose but more aggressive.

@ssalogel

For scale, a female african elephant is 7.2-8.5 feet at the shoulder, according to Wikipedia. A moose is 4.6 – 6.9 ft. at the shoulder. So instead of thinking “This animal is a bit bigger than a deer” you can think “This animal is barely smaller than an elephant”

And they can run up to 40 miles per hour

A 16 wheeler with fur

sssshale: kyuubified: ace-feminist: brunhiddensmusings: ouch-that-hurts: “But your abuse made...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 20:12:49 -0400

sssshale:

kyuubified:

ace-feminist:

brunhiddensmusings:

ouch-that-hurts:

“But your abuse made you kind”

I was always kind. My abuse tested my kindness and you are testing my patience.

‘no, my abuse made me a spineless jellyfish living in perpetual fear of standing up for myself, but thank you for framing that as a positive thing you like about me’

“I am a good person despite my abuse, not because of it”

Abuse made me hypersensitive to other people’s emotions while neglecting my own boundaries and comfort because I’m afraid of upsetting someone or having them lash out at me.

I was already strong. I was already smart. I was already empathetic. Anything I learned over time comes from me and not from my abuse or my abuser. Fuck anyone who asks survivors to give abusers even a singular ounce of credit for their own attributes. Literally eat a bag of shit covered dicks and never speak again.

connors-g1rl: idk why but i’m laughing when i imagine this...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 19:58:10 -0400

connors-g1rl:

idk why but i’m laughing when i imagine this situation in real life

spooniestrong: ““We have defined disability as a matter of social justice—disability residing not...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 19:56:35 -0400

spooniestrong:

““We have defined disability as a matter of social justice—disability residing not in paralysis but in stairs without an accompanying ramp, not in blindness but in the lack of Braille and audio-recorded books. Disability itself doesn’t live solely in depression or anxiety but rather in a whole host of stereotypes and damaging material realities, not in dyslexia but in teaching methods unwilling to flex, not in lupus or multiple sclerosis but in the belief that certain bodily conditions are a fate worse than death.””

— Eli Clare